Why?

Girl: I need to talk to you about something.

Guy: Ok What?

I'll tell you later.

Ugh...Just tell me now.

No. I'd rather tell you in person. I'll tell you when I see you tonight.

So why did you bring it up now? You could've just told me later and not have me wonder about what the hell you have to say for the whole afternoon.

What's the big deal?


The big deal is I don't know if you got diagnosed with cancer or if you bought a new pair of Seven jeans. If you want to break up or get married. Maybe you want to confess that you've been cheating on me or that you think I'm cheating on you. This is gonna eat me up all day.

I don't have cancer.

Ughh. Why do I even try.

Wait... cheating?

It was just an example.

Why would you even bring that up?

Ugh goddammit. I was just saying that I have no idea about what you might want to talk about.

Why would cheating even come in your mind? ARE you cheating on me??

I hate my life.



Why do girlfriends torture us like this??????


Our boss once told us that he had an announcement that he was gonna make at the end of the week. Everyone ran around crazy trying to figure it out. They asked me why I didn't care. Maybe it's cause my ex's tortured me so much that I erase what people say now when they tell me I'll find out later.

I haven't been excited about hearing what anyone's had to say since 1999. Thanks girls (sarcasm?).