Tuesday, January 23, 2007

American Idle

Image Uploaded by ImageShack Toolbar American Idol is childish and annoying. It's a complete waste of time. But I swear I sat there and watched both 2 hour episodes last week.

The contestants got worse. Paula is taking more drugs. And Simon and Randy have gotten meaner. Everything we like about the show has been upped. Seacrest has even gotten kinda funny. If you didn't watch the show before now's a good time to start.

It's on tonight. Watch and lose brain cells with the rest of us. What the hell else are you gonna watch? NCIS? You wouldn't something that f*ckin gay.

How about a video of Paula Abdul drunk and coked up on tv. here

Monday, January 22, 2007

"I gotta pee!"

Last week women's credibility hit a new all-time low.

I worked the door at Jumby Bay for "Ladies Night." Chicks had to pay five bucks and could drink anything they wanted til midnight. You offer that to any guy and he'll be stoked. But chicks are so spoiled, pampered, and cheap that they bitch and moan about the cover charge. And they still try to sneak in.

You think they'd have smooth ways of getting in, actually who am I kidding, you know men are the best liars. They all use the same excuse. All of them. One damn strategy for getting in. And you'd think it would be a good one. After they get together the best they can come up with is, "I really gotta go pee!" Yea whatever lady let me see your damn I.D. and five bucks.

One guy even took the advice of one of his girlfriends. As soon as he walked up and saw me he said, "Man I really need to use the bathroom." I told him, "Save it buddy. There's no cover for the guys." And MAGICALLY his bulging bladder calmed down. And since he spoiled the excuse his idiot girlfriend couldn't say the same thing right after him. Of course not, she's too smart to do something that dumb. That fool walked up to me and had the nerve to say, "I'm just going in for a sec. (in the sweet voice)Do I really have to pay????" Yea bitch. Five bucks please. I shoulda made it ten for being a pain in my ass.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Back In Paradise

Image Uploaded by ImageShack Toolbar I was going to write about how nice it is to be back at school. How funny it is that I don't have one teacher that doesn't have a thick accent. Or how the cute co-eds got cuter over the winter break. Or how dumb college kids have gotten. But all that has taken a back seat for a sec because I spent the day listening to the hottest album I've heard in a while.

John Legend's Once Again is easily the best R&B album out. Maybe the best album period on the scene now. Thanks to Rebecca for recommending it.

And go Buckeyes! I'll be in the heart of Gator country tonight, Gator's Dockside, in Wellington. Those geeks come out with their faces painted and Gator alumni t-shirts every Saturday. I can't wait to see the face paint smear with their reptilian tears coming down. hahaha

Friday, January 05, 2007

Happy New Year

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us Happy New Year! I'm ready to get this annum going. School's about to start up again, and I'm going full-time this go around. My only resolution is to not be as lazy as I was the last 25 years of my life. I'm so lazy I gave up giving myself a haircut the other day because I didn't feel like holding the clippers anymore. So now I have a bunch of patches all over my cavesa. Shameful. lol

p.s. Brooke Burke's still got it. gallery