Junior's House Party

Friday night, Junior invited me to his pad for a b-day jam. It's not actually 'his' pad, the parents were away for the weekend (yes, very high-schoolesque). I was more unsure about it than Ludacris at a country bar. I called Pablo up and we headed out there.

I was expecting testosterone overkill. A couple of guys sittin on a couch. Maybe a few playing Xbox in the other room. You know, some gay-ass, homosexual bullshit. I was gonna say hi, do some PR, and dip out as soon as no one was looking.

So we pull up and have to park about four houses down because there so many cars around his house. I hear the salsa music from the front lawn. We walk in and the party is jumping off and out and all over the place. Latinos everywhere. And surprisingly about half of them are chicks. And most of them were cuties. I had to get my game-face on. We found our way to the bar (read: the kitchen table) loaded with empty bottles of good liquor and half-full bottles of some questionable shit. It was like 'Jose's Loco Vodka' or something. A real buzzkill until I looked towards the back of the kitchen where a pot of gold, or should I say, keg of gold was sitting silently waiting for me to approach her. She was the most beautiful creature there. No one was getting any beer, so I asked if she was dry already. I got no answer. In fact, I don't think they even knew what it was exactly (I know, veird). Maybe if there was a Corona sticker on the side it would've been different. Alas, she was as wet as Kelly Clarkson's ass at the VMA's. Let the partying officially begin!

After a keg stand, the social lubricant began doing its work. I met a few cuties and did some PR with Junior and his brothers. Everyone was dancing so you know I had to show them how Knight7 works it. Junior came out to the dance floor too. Someone started to chant 'Go junior, go Junior.' And oddly enough, it sounded a lot like him. We realized it WAS him! We were thinking 'who starts their own chant?' I thought it was something your friends did to cheer you on. And he was really getting into it 'Come on yall, go Junior, go Junior.'

And all this while a guy was playing what I think was a musical instrument. It kinda looked like a round cheese grater. And he had what looked like a fork in his hand. I think that's what they played with when Spanish music was first invented back in the 1400's. Spanish people really stick to their roots. I wanted to go outside and get some branches that I could hit together to join the band.

All in all, it was a great success. A multi-cultural partying experience. And a history lesson! All for free. You can't beat that with a bat. Or a branch.