AWW SHIT!!

Check out Tourettes Guy. There are a bunch of videos. Here are a few of my favs.

Interview
Bob Saget
Rude Awakening
Customer Inquiry

Courtesy of Tourettes Guy.com

Summa School

So I rolled off of JR's couch after partying all night Sunday and started classes yesterday. Yes, in my club gear, wreaking of cigarettes and liquor. I'm only taking two for the summer: Finite Math, and Strategies. My Finite professor is nice but retarded. He got lost about five times in the lesson and couldn't complete half of the problems without the help of the class (read: me).

Strategies will be fun. The professor is mad cool. Of course I'm her fav already. This should be an easy summer.

Mahna Mahna

I love the new Dr. Pepper commercial. It's tight with the old Muppets song. The only thing that's veird is its long as name. How many flavors can we fit into one beverage. Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper. Come on now.

courtesy of iFilm

I'm Back Baby

Hallelujah, it worked! I went to Circuit City. Bought a new power supply, and let Paul install it for me. Happy Friday and have a great weekend! How bout some web content.

Watch Tom handle this like a pro.

Quick Movie Review: Batman Begins A-

I usually get disappointed when I go see super hyped flicks, but this one lives up to it.
It really gives you reference for all the other movies in the series. The story is told so well that it almost seems plausible that a guy would dress up in a mask and cape to fight crime.



Everything worked in the movie. The only part I didn't care for was Katie Holmes. She plays a good-hearted-but-tough district attorney. And she really sucks at it. Not that her acting was terribly bad, but she has no screen presence. There's nothing about her that grabbed me and pulled me more into the movie. The two fit bitches in the lambo pulled me in much more. Highly recommend. A-


MetaCritic - 70
Ebert & Roeper Review
Apple trailer

Celebrity Workaholics

I was reading this month's Elle article on Lindsay Lohan and realized something: I'm a lazy fuck. (article) In it she talks about how much she works. She says that a couple of days ago she pulled a 21-hour work day. 21 hours?! I got to thinking, if I was given a chance to be a famous star, could I handle it? Would I be able to be pulled across town and across the country from one obligation to another with little or no rest?

I would have to say absolutely not. I feel like I'm gonna have a heart-attack when I get scheduled for a double at the restaurant. And that's only a ten hour day!

I'm starting to think that one reason why famous people are famous isn't because of a lucky star or a generous inheritance from a dead relative. It just might be that they are willing to work much harder than the average scmuck is. If an 18 year-old girl can do it, why can't I.

The moral of the story? I have to get off my ass if I ever want to get anything. I'm gonna try something this week: whenever the thought "I don't feel like it" comes up, I will immediately do the thing that I didn't feel like doing. Maybe after time I'll rid myself of this crappy work ethic. I try to party like a rockstar, now it's time to work like one.

Faithfuls

If you are reading this post you are probably one of my faithfuls. A true fan of the site. Thanks for being so patient with me while I try to get my cpu fixed. I will be doing all remote postings until the sit. is figured out. I love you.

Sin City Here We Come!

We got the wrinkles ironed out for a trip to Vegas this summer. It's gonna be off the chizzain! I can't wait. We're even putting together a night at the Playpen suite at the Palms Hotel and Casino. It's like a grand a night, but it is worth it. Wowaweewa!

Chappelle "Not On Crack"

The rumors that Chappelle has gone crazy have been refuted by the funny-man himself. "I'm not crazy, I'm not smoking crack. I'm definitely stressed out," said the 31-year-old comedian, who escaped last month to Durban, South Africa, for a spiritual retreat as he called it.

"You hear so many voices jockeying for position in your mind that you want to make sure that you hear your own voice," he said. "So I figured, let me just cut myself off from everybody, take a minute and pull a Flintstone -- stop a speeding car by using my bare feet as the brakes."

We're here for you Dave. Now get back in the fucking studio and make us laugh monkey.

Another Day, Another Party

Sitting bored one day, Hutter and I decided to have a day of volleyball and drinking. No list this time, we invited the whole Smokey Bones lot. From all the Nics and Mikes, to Larry Wayne Dial and everyone in between.

We kept the logistics pretty simple: burgers, hot dogs, a keg and a volleyball. Later we added some margaritas and pina coladas. Very nice.

As soon as we got the keg set and tapped at 11:30 AM, me, Hutter, Mike B, and Nic S started boozin. And we got the kinks out of our rusty v-ball skills. Especially being as though I haven't played since 7th-grade P.E.

We had a pretty decent turnout. We had already figured the sell-out factor. The usual flakes were no-call, no shows: Janelle, Mike P, etc... We didn't expect them anyways.

So you're probably wondering about the dirty dish: Did anyone end up vomiting? Did anybody get naked? Was anyone responsibly sober? No, No, and definitely No. Thats not to say that it wasn't a blast. Keg stands, 8-man beer bongs, on bar dancing, body shots! Holy shit did we get wasted. And that was all before 2 in the afternoon! After that we got out the shot glasses and downed about 6 mystery shots. I don't know what the ingredients were, and I was the one that made them!

By 9 things were starting to wind down and the druggies did their thing. I couldn't join. One because I was way too wasted, and two, we had a lot of cleaning up to do. But a good time was had by all. And let me take a second to show some recognition and give out some awards of the event:

Most Improved: Jenni. In the last outing she was a wash out, but she came through this time. Her stock went way up. Starting off with a hot bathing suit. And solidified by a great performance on the keg stand. Nice work.

Best at Handling Intoxication: Cole. This guy can drink! As soon as he showed up he started hittin the keg. Not once did I see him without a drink in hand. When we were doing shots, he was combining two and three shots to drink. And to top it off, at the end of the night, he made a gravity bong and inhaled a bowl of the freshest skunk in one take! And after looked as if he was drinking kool-aid all night. Big-ups.

Best Volleyball Performance: Mike B. He was the only one that challenged me. I kicked a lot of ass, but he really held it down. A couple of spikes, a couple of blocks, a couple of cuts and bruises. Well good shit.

Best Swimming Performance: Kierstin. That chick can swim like Nemo. I swear I've never been beaten by a chick. But I'll gladly admit that she's pretty tight. One note though: I beat her in the second race. Take that bitch.

Biggest Asshole Performance. Pierre. By about 3 in the pm, I was well-wasted and I yelled at some random chick for going back and making herself a drink behind our bar. The poor girl was mortified. Good-going asshole.

Wasted Endurance Challenge Winner: J.R. By the second game of volley, he came stumbling onto the court. He couldn't hit the ball, he could barely stand up. But he lasted the whole day and night. When most people that were getting wasted slowed down with a couple of bottles of water (present company included), he was drinking his happy ass to apparent oblivion. But he kept on-going. He was actually the last person standing. At 1 in the morning, when everyone was passed out, he was up watching tv. Big ups alkie.

Congratulations to all the winners. We're already planning V-Ball Day: The Sequel. Bigger, better, and some damn nakedness this time please!


post script:More pics to come. Waiting for Hutter to format and email them.

*update- more photos can be found at Photobucket.com. just click the link and type in smokeybones where it says "go to album."