Saturday, September 08, 2007

Headline: High School Star Goes Nude

I saw that headline on a news site with the lede: Nudie pics of 18-year-old "High School Musical" star Vanessa Hudgens have hit the Internet. Will this hurt Disney's empire?

Hurt Disney? No.

The victims are going to be the penises of all the pubescent boys who are going to vigorously scour the internet for the pictures and vigorously masturbate for the next six months straight.

Stuff like this never happened when I grew up. Could you imagine if nude pictures of a young Alyssa Milano came out while we were fantasizing about her on Who's The Boss? Even a naked D.J. Tanner. It would've been game over. Seriously, I'm still asking my johnson for forgiveness for when I first saw Pam Anderson in Barb Wire. Especially the director's cut, with the extended hose scene. I'm so sorry little buddy.

(editor's note: Sorry can't show the nsfw version; my lawyers would have a fit.)

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